OK, let's get this section kicked off....\n \nIN PRISON: You spend the majority of your time in an 8’X10’ cell. \nAT WORK: You spend most of your day in a 6’X8’ office. \n\nIN PRISON: You get three meals a day. \nAT WORK: You only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for it. \n\nIN PRISON: You get time off for good behaviour. \nAT WORK: You get rewarded for good behaviour with more work. \n\nIN PRISON: A guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you. \nAT WORK: You must carry around a security card and open all the doors yourself. \n\nIN PRISON: You can watch tv and play games. \nAT WORK: You get fired for watching tv and playing games. \n\nIN PRISON: They allow your friends and family to visit you. \nAT WORK: You cannot even speak to your family or friends. \n\nIN PRISON: You spend most of your life looking through bars from the inside wanting to get out. \nIN WORK: You spend most of your time wanting to get out and go inside bars. \n\nIN PRISON: There are wardens who are often sadistic. \nAT WORK: They are called Managers \n\n-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\nBabies\nOne afternoon a little girl excitedly approached her mother, and announced that she had learned where babies come from at school that day. Amused, her mother replied, "Really, sweetie? Why don't you tell me all about it?"\n\nThe little girl explained, "Well... OK... the mommy and daddy take off all of their clothes, and the daddy's thing sort of stands up, and the mommy puts it in her mouth, and then it sort of explodes, and that's where babies come from."\n\nHer mom shook her head, leaned over to meet her eye to eye, and said, "Oh, honey, that's sweet, but that's not where babies come from.\n.\n.\n.\n.\n.\n\n.................................................. that's where jewelery comes from."\n-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\-\nDoctor?\n \nA dad walks into a market with his young son. The kid is holding a 20p piece. Suddenly, the boy starts choking, going blue in the face. The dad realizes the boy has swallowed the coin and starts panicking, shouting for help. \n\nA well dressed, attractive, but serious looking woman in a blue business suit is sitting at a coffee bar in the market reading her newspaper and sipping a cup of coffee. \n\nAt the sound of the commotion, she looks up, puts her coffee cup down on the saucer, neatly folds the newspaper and places it on the counter, gets up from her seat and makes her way, unhurried, across the market. \n\nReaching the boy, the woman carefully takes hold of the boy's testicles and starts to squeeze, gently at first and then ever more firmly. \n\nAfter a few seconds the boy convulses violently and coughs up the 20p piece, which the woman deftly catches in her free hand.\n\nReleasing the boy, the woman hands the coin to the father and walks back to her seat in the coffee bar without saying a word. \n\nAs soon as he is sure that his son has suffered no lasting ill effects, the father rushes over to the woman and starts thanking her saying, "I've never seen anybody do anything like that before, it was fantastic. Are you a doctor?"\n\n"No," the woman replies. "I work for the Inland Revenue Service."